In yesterday’s Times, Dan Barry took a look at the Segways, or rather the “pogo stick on wheels.” We always thought Segways were for rich, white men and while that was confirmed it seems they’re for the lazy and delusional too.

Itsi Atkins, the founder of the New York City Segway Club, estimates New York City has “only 50 or so Segways, and maybe 30 owners,” of which, “he owns five.” Is New York City slow to join the revolution because some owners are inexplicably hoarding $25,000 of Segways? No, they’re just completely unnecessary, absurdly expensive, impossible for users to repair, and prone to tossing their users off the back. In the end, image conscious New Yorkers are not going to shell out $5,000 to look like a fool.

Word travels fast through the streetwear market, because when you’re camped out all night for limited edition pink unicorn Dunks, you have plenty of time to gossip. A new rumor making the rounds is that satirical website, Dontbelievethehypebeast.com, a short lived parody of the hype crazed, limited edition, plastic toy loving streetwear scene, was created by none other than Zoo York’s LA crew.

It makes sense. Zoo York doesn’t get much respect, they’re carried in mainstream discount stores like TJ Maxx, and most DBTHB posts parodied West Coast brands (like the fake collaboration between The Hundreds and Saved By the Bell). Have we cracked this puzzle? We don’t know for sure, but we’ll give a limited edition pat on the back to anyone with info.

What does it mean when a fashionable car magazine features a dressed up bike messenger holding a bike on the cover? Intersection Magazine just thinks fixed gear bicycles (and vintage yachts!) make fashionable accessories for your car. The fashion spread of bike messengers with their bikes, the feature on ReBar’s Parking spot intervention and David Gallaugher’s grass lined wheel are interesting from a design and fashion perspective, but overlook what they mean to urban life: bikes are the quickest way through a city, excessive private parking deprives people of public space, and there just isn’t enough space to ditch our shoes and run barefoot in the grass. Considering Intersection Magazine’s manifesto, it’s not surprising they glossed over the problems cars cause.

Cars move us. Cars let us go where we want, when we want, how we want - they reflect our desires as they answer our needs. On the street, they’re our clothes. On the move, they’re our homes - we use them as our living rooms, offices, studios and sometimes our bedrooms.

Only 2 in 10 New York City residents even own a car, and unless they have a congestion fetish, they’re not effective for selfishly getting them where they want, when they want or how they want. Even more ridiculous are Intersection’s “Urban Aggressive Off-Roading” videos championing SUVs recklessly driving through roundabouts and skateparks, the sort of spaces ReBar and Gallaugher were promoting through their art.

Get out of here. New York City has enough people being killed by vehicles.

In anticipation of tomorrow’s unveiling, Anish Kapoor’s Sky Mirror is getting full service treatment. This evening at least a half dozen workers polished and buffed the convex and concave steel surfaces to a shine. At 35 feet in diameter and 23 tons, readying the Sky Mirror for display is no small task.

Sky Mirror will be on display to the public from September 19 through October 26, 2006. It’s located at Rockefeller Center (5th Avenue between 49th and 50th Street).

Photographs, let alone renderings, hardly do this piece justice. Go check it out, but be prepared to elbow your way through a crowd. People were already massing around to catch a mirrored glimpse of themselves. We wonder how many rubbernecking drivers will crash their cars driving past on 5th Avenue.

Spend enough time wandering around New York City and you’ll start seeing the black and white stickers plainly stating, BNE. The fairly innocuous stickers found in New York, San Francisco and Tokyo sometimes contain Japanese script translating to “visit” or “come to” among other things. According to Gavins Newson, the mayor of San Francisco, the BNE stickers are so “large, unsightly, confusing and utterly inappropriate” that he’s offering $2,500 for the arrest of the artist, BNE or Benet.

Though this amount of coverage is a huge boost for Benet, the real star of the NY Times article is Officer Christopher Putz, the head of the San Francisco Vandal Squad.

Officer Putz, who has been on the graffiti beat since 2001, takes his work seriously; he will not allow his face to be photographed and he gives his age merely as “in my 30’s,” for fear of tipping his hand. “It’s a chess game,” he said.

He won’t be photographed, but he will be videotaped. Officer Putz’s chess game is poor. Even better is his weak explanation of broken windows theory:

If there is graffiti on the building, you might assume it is alright to throw gum wrappers on the ground and spit gum on the sidewalk.

Welcome to the 1950s! After those rapscallions are finished spitting on the sidewalk, they’ll be tipping cows and stuffing themselves into phone booths. Watch out, there’s a new sheriff in town, and he’s out to clean up Benet’s mess!

Photo of Benet roller by CrunchyPickle.
Photo of BNE Sticker by TriciaWang.

205, the rumored “bar-lounge-restaurant” alliance of Serge Becker (nightlife impresario of La Esquina fame) and Aaron “A-Ron” Bondaroff (cool kid of aNYthing fame) was confirmed last week. Who cares that New York Magazine broke the news back in August.

On Friday night, 205 hosted the after party for ThreeAsFour’s fashion week show. Rub N Tug fueled the danceparty, free drinks flowed, people got sweaty on the floor, and Vincent Gallo was skeezy as ever (pushing up on Mark, the Cobra Snake’s girlfriend).

Silver walls, tinfoil covered fixtures, exposed pipes, and disco balls on the upstairs level suggest ThreeAsFour’s own loft a few blocks away (and the Factory of some dude named Andy Warhol). Downstairs, the shady carpets and rec room vibe of 6’s and 8’s are replaced by hand lettered plywood and stacks of broken televisions. It’s the aftermath of a night dumpster diving and robbing construction sites.

From artist, Anish Kapoor, the creator of Chicago’s Bean, comes the Sky Mirror. From September 19th through October 27th, this 35-foot concave mirror made of polished stainless steel will rest at Rockefeller Center and offer an upside down view of 30 Rockefeller Plaza.

Its concave side, angled upward, will face 30 Rockefeller Plaza, reflecting an upside-down portrait of this elegant and iconic New York City skyscraper and the shifting sky around it. Its convex side, facing Fifth Avenue, will reflect a more earthly vision: viewers in the midst of the adjacent streetscape. The sculpture is freestanding, with polished surfaces that are seamless and uninterrupted. This optical object will change through the day and night and is an example of what Kapoor describes as a “non-object,” a sculpture that, despite its monumentality, suggests a window or void and often seems to vanish into its surroundings.

At nearly three stories tall, it’s a larger version of Nottingham’s Sky Mirror. In case you forgot, this is the second time in recent months that New York City has received a piece of secondhand public art. In May, Larry Silverstein unveiled Jeff Koons’ “Balloon Flower (Red)” at WTC 7, just one of many versions of the same sculpture.

If we can’t have a fresh new shape, at least we’ve got it bigger.

Computer rendering of Sky Mirror via NY Times.

Just a reminder: today is the final day to sign up for Street Wars, a 3 week long, 24/7, watergun assassination tournament. At the start of the game on September 25, you’ll receive a file on your first target with their name, photo, and contact info. Using any means possible, you will hunt down your target and shoot them with water. After a successful hit, your victim will hand over the info on their target, and your hunt continues. Money, power and respect are awarded to the last player standing. Of course assassins need time off to recuperate and hone their craft, so the city block of your workplace as well as buses, bus stops and bars will be safe zones.

Unfortunately for Street Wars assassins, one of our associates has never needed structured competitions and cash incentives to soak friends and enemies. Razor Apple is sponsoring his effort to soak Street Wars assassins with several hundred biodegradable water balloons and a launcher, among other accoutrements. It doesn’t matter that his rogue attacks won’t count. The pleasure of salting your game is enough.

Photo by Darryl Bush, San Francisco Chronicle.

We missed the Second Annual Deitch Art Parade last week (we were stuck in a well), produced by Deitch Projects, Creative Time and PAPER magazine. If you’re like us, you’re in luck because Nick Georgio made a great little video of the festivities (via Wooster Collective).

Gothamist and SuperTouch provide further documentation (or inspiration for next year).

Photo by Blaine Davis.

Face it, you’ve grown comfortable pacing a line between your apartment, work, and the liquor store. This weekend, break with your routine, turn the streets into a playground, and explore the city with Conflux, the New York City festival of modern psychogeography. “Conflux is the annual New York festival for contemporary psychogeography, the investigation of everyday urban life through emerging artistic, technological and social practice.” Guy Debord, the situationist who coined psychogeography, admits it has a “rather pleasing vagueness,” so don’t feel bad if you’re confused. Just check out the extensive schedule, and find something to do. The liquor store will be there when you get back.

Photo of the Tide and Current Taxi by Marie Lorenz, an artist participating in the Conflux.